Mommy ADD

I have adult A.D.D. Since having two children come onto the scene very quickly together, my world has been spinning out of control. Prior to kids, I wasn't very good with the day to day simple crap like actually hanging my freshly bought, or freshly laundered clothes in the closet. They'd just get put in piles on any available surface. However, it was liveable.

Can you imagine what it's like now that I have two children also? Trying to keep my mind on one subject while focusing them onto an activity, and not living my life in the proverbial fast lane has been hard to deal with.

Sometimes just getting out the door with both of them is too much to wrap my mind around. Have you tried navigating any kind of shop with a double stroller, much less the two children that are supposed to be sitting in it?

My favorite store has become Target - I can one stop shop there. I go in, and hit the toy dept first, allowing my kids to choose as much stuff as they want to keep them entertained in the cart, and then I start sprinting around the store. First stop toiletries, next cleaning products, then the pet dept, food market, and back to baby stuff for diapers, wipes, and clothes. I feel like I'm in a race against time. As I make my way to the checkout, I'm strategically removing the "borrowed" expensive toys from the cart, or prying them out of little fingers, and in a good day I'll get out with just one new toy each. Candy would be cheaper, but the sugar moods are too much for one human person to deal with.

Then there's this whole new concept of meal planning? What's that? Hubby & I had choices galore of where to go to eat dinner - sushi, cuban, seafood, italian, vietnamese, you name it, we tried it -- something new almost every night. Living in the suburbs of a major city makes that easy to do ~ however, now with two kids I don't want to subject anyone else to the horror that's called dining out with toddlers. Instead, I have to struggle and figure out at least 3 healthy meals per day, & get to the grocery shop with them in tow.

We did actually make it out to our local & un-interesting OutBack Steakhouse last night. We hadn't been out since the in-laws were with us at Xmas. Unfortunately, they sat us next to this couple who immediately rolled their eyes as we tried to get the kids into highchairs, and because they put us at one of those tables that has a stationary booth seat against the wall, and two chairs on the other side of the table -- we had to sit opposite our toddlers. I was up and down like a jack-in-the-box reaching across the table to remove whatever offending object my son was trying to wield on my daughter. It was a nightmare. My boobs kept popping into the glasses of water on the table, as I tried to contain my kids in their chairs. The fact that we kept getting stony stares, and sighs from the peanut gallery, did not help matters.

I barely ate, and I certainly didn't order a bellini, or any other frozen swirly pretty drink from the bar, although I desperately wanted to... I also wanted dessert badly, but I didn't dare stay long enough for that. Talk about a stressful evening!

Happy Hour for moms in DC!!

So after The Today show piece on Do playgroups and happy hour mix, our message groups went crazy. The most unfortunate thing to come out of this segment with Meridith Vieira, is that it pitts moms, against moms. Those who drink, V's those who are tee-totallers. One is a good mom, one is not.

My mother drank all the time while raising me. She took me to bars during the afternoon with her friends and their children. She would stop by the "off license" after grocery shopping for a 6 pack of Tennants Pilsner Lager. I remember thinking when I got older that the only thing I thought was a little dysfunctional was that back in the 80's they had these super sexy models on the cans of beer. In bikinis.

By the time I was 14 she was paying me to stay at home and babysit my brother by offering me bottles of Peach Schnapps. Delicious with freshly squeezed orange juice, and a shot of vodka. It was totally normal... In Ireland.

I grew up in a country where we didn't designate a certain time "Happy Hour". Anytime is an alright time to have a drink.

When I moved to the states at 18, I was shocked to find out that I could no longer go into a bar legally and get a drink. Here I was an adult, who had travelled thousands of miles away from home by herself to a foreign country, but now I couldn't go out for a vodka and coke. It was surreal. It also meant that I wanted it more, and went to extreme lengths to get it.

Growing up in Europe it was considered completely normal for teens (you know like 14/15/16 years old) to have a beer or glass of wine with dinner, and with their parents present. A 16 year old would never have to "ask for" or worse "sneak" a bottle of beer while he's chilling out playing Xbox.

I have had to check myself on more than one occasion from offering a friend's teenager to help himself to a beer from the fridge. For one thing, my husband, who doesn't drink and is American, would be horrified. My friend, who also drinks, would definitely freak out.

I'm sure 46% of you are thinking with this kinda upbringing I must be a complete alcoholic. You'd be wrong. Sometimes after spending 13 hours a day with two toddlers, I do feel like having a glass of wine. I love having a margarita or two when my husband and I take the kids and go out for tex mex food. I've also had weekend bar-b-ques where most of the adults are drinking some kind of adult beverage, while the children are splashing around in a paddling pool, next to our inground swimming pool, which we're usually floating around in - with those floaty devices that keep your drinks cold on a hot summer day.

Many many weeks ago the Washington Post had an article on Happy Hour places for you to take your children in the DC area. I made sure our moms group knew about them, and we'll try to experience all of them. In no particular order:

WONDERLAND BALLROOM . Once a week, the popular Columbia Heights dive bar with booths made from minivan seats gives itself over to those typically strapped into the back of a minivan. From 5-8 p.m. on Wednesdays, the upstairs bar at Wonderland features Baby Happy Hour. The room is toy-cluttered and baby-proofed -- a safety gate at the top of the stairs keeps the toddlers from tumbling. As is typical when this crowd gets together, the parents set up play dates and the kids roam free, but now it's all done over pints.

http://www.thewonderlandballroom.com

NICK'S RIVERSIDE GRILLE. This restaurant along Georgetown's waterfront offers up a relaxed outdoor bar with a more low-key atmosphere than the see-and-be-seen attitude of neighboring Sequoia. And through the end of September 2007, Nick's will be slinging more than burgers and fries. On Saturdays from noon to 4 p.m., the restaurant will offer kids 12 and younger free craft kits: junior can make a sun visor, or other arts project, while mom gets together with friends for a Cosmo!

http://www.dcseafood.com/nicks

INDIGO LANDING - has amazing views of Washington's skyline, the restaurant dishes up carrot sticks and apple slices as soon as kids sit down. The restaurant also serves kids' takes on adult cocktails: While moms kick back on the expansive deck with a Cool Plantation ($9), a cocktail made with mango-flavored rum, buckwheat honey, bananas and lime juice, kids can slurp down a Banana Split ($2.50), a drink made with buckwheat honey, bananas, lime juice and crushed ice. Our moms can sip on a Charleston Bog ($9), a thirst-quencher made with Maker's Mark bourbon, smashed raspberries, white cranberry juice, crushed lime and mint, while the junior set can sample the Charleston Cooler ($2.50), which swaps the bourbon for red cranberry juice.

http://www.indigolanding.com


ARLINGTON CINEMA N DRAFTHOUSE. Converted from a 1930s Art Deco theater shows family-friendly flicks regularly on the schedule, so moms can have an ice cold one while watching "Ice Age" or "Over the Hedge." Typically the $5.50 films are scheduled in the afternoons, but at least once a month they are shown during happy hour. The theater also regularly offers live entertainment (doors open at 11:30 a.m).

http://www.arlingtondrafthouse.com/

UPDATED ARTICLE ON WEEKEND ACTIVITIES FOR KIDS AT ARLINGTON CINEMA N DRAFTHOUSE. CLICK HERE!

The hell hole that is BCF

So, I have been desperately looking for a jogging stroller for the kids.

My Combi Twin Savvy has really taken a beating on the trails & even going around the block. My husband has also managed repeatedly kick the middle wheels in the back when he's pushing it.

When I bought it at Buy Buy Baby I was sold on the fact that it would fold in half, like a golf bag, and slip into my trunk. The fact that it only weighed something like 24lbs was also a big selling point! Even though it's never been "one handed" folding like they claim, it is still pretty easy to pop open and shut, and throw in the boot.

I got a bunch of referrals from my local mommies group who all had various experiences with the different models. I even joined a "stroller swap" group. Who knew that snobbery existed so strongly among moms about "makes and models" of the stroller. Apparantly there is the crowd who just have to have all the latest bells and whistles - you know the Phil & Ted E3 kind that cost around $550, versus the real life, stay at home moms who value the dollar, and still think they can be stylish with a lesser model. Each group has it own's reasons for hating the other.

SO, because I need to fit it in the boot of my car, and not remove the wheels to do so, and because I desperately need to lose another 30lbs, I bit the bullet and headed to Burlington Coat Factory after a call from a mom who said they had them, assembled, light weight, good price, and ready to go. Well that took care of my Amazon quandry - I simply didn't want to get a stroller without trying it out, nor did I want a stroller that *I* would have to put together. So the kids and I took off on our most excellent adventure yet... NOT...

The place itself is a logistical nightmare in the layout. I couldn't get my stroller down the "wheel chair accessible ramp" because that's were they decided to set up their displays & signs... DUH!!! How is a mom of two with a double wide supposed to get down 5 or 6 steps into the store otherwise? Secondly, as a mom with a double wide, you need to be able to navigate aisles - forget it at this place. Thirdly, the "baby depot" is upstairs, and they've hidden all signs for the elevator. I watched as one mommy loaded her Peg Perego and new baby onto the escalator, because she'd given up looking for the elevator! Gasp, shock, doesn't she know how dangerous that is??? LOL, if only I coulda figured a way to get the combi stroller onto the escalator, I too woulda tried it. However, their escalators are wide enough for one skinny lady to ride.

Eventually I found someone who worked there... they don't wear a uniform, and are all in hiding, trying to do as little work as possible, obviously. Was directed to elevator, but had to move racks out of the way to get to the doors, and then roll over a bunch of broken hangers and crap on the floor. Finally got upstairs to baby depot, and found that was in even more of a mess than downstairs had been. Baby sh*t everywhere! It was a nightmare. Why can't discount places look like the inside of Nordstroms? I mean does it really have to be this unorganised? It was literally like a mine field trying to find the stroller department.

I don't know if it's because I've got ADD issues, but for me, just getting through this store would make me NEVER want to go back. I will for sure NEVER go back with kids in tow. I may go back if I'm bored and want to clean up someone else's crap.

Found the InStep Safari TT, but had to move 20 strollers out of the line up just to get it out into the aisle (where I'd left my stroller and kids unattended). Loved that it was so lightweight, and fairly easy to fold. It is a mammoth size stroller though for sure. Nothing else will probably fit in my trunk if that's in there. The combi only takes up half of the space, so I always have room for "junk" in the trunk.

Got the kids into it, and played with the straps, all the while looking for a sales person to come help me out. I asked two people - one I found hiding in a storage room, and the other one who was talking on his cell phone to page someone to come up to the stroller dept.

About 20 minutes later, I was ready to just abandon ship when finally a guy came over. I explained that this was the stroller I wanted, and would like to pay for it, and have him wheel it out to my car. He told me I couldn't have the model that was already put together, and they DON'T put together products for their customers. I could have it in a box, ready to assemble myself. I told him first off that I could have bought it from amazon.com - same price, free shipping, and not had to navigate all the hassles of coming to the local BCF, but for the fact that they would either sell me the display model at full retail price, no less, or put a new one together for me... but nope he wasn't going to budge.

Thus far I'd invested several hours, getting there, unloading the kids, navigating my way around their screwed up store, waiting around for a sales associate, and as much as I just wanted to leave, I just couldn't do it. I know... I shoulda not only left without buying it, but I probably should have written them a letter about my experience! Might I just also say, that if their price and Amazon.com's prices are the same, then they cannot have a store that looks like a bomb hit it, with their excuse being that they are a "discount" store.

SO... here I am, a day out, with a stroller still in the box. I am overwhelmed & stressed out at the thought of attempting to put it together. My husband is of course away at some rugby thing or another for the weekend, not that he would be any help in that department if he were here.